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jmc_bksMonday again, dammit. Time to SBD.
Helen Bianchin, Susan Napier and Robyn Donald are my guilty pleasure reads. Pub'd by Harlequin Presents, they tend to be mind candy. Bianchin has a pretty set formula: h/h are already lovers, but there is a social class issue and an ex-lover who wants the hero back, making the heroine insecure. *sigh* Why must I read these? I don't know, but I must. I cannot resist their siren song when I see Bianchin's name on a book in the end cap.
As I read HB's most current HP, The Marriage Possession (who comes up with these titles, that doesn't make sense and doesn't really go with the plot), I have came to the conclusion that most relationship problems in RomanceLandia could be solved if only the h/h spoke to each other about their goals and expectations and feelings. Aren't there advice columnists in RomanceLandia? Don't the h/h read the newpaper or magazines? There must not be, because if there were a Dan Savage or a Carolyn Hax or a Dear Abby or an Agony Aunt of some kind in them, the h/h wouldn't be having these problems. 'Cause DS and CH would be telling them to sit down and communicate.
So I am taking it upon myself (*sigh, hand to forehead*) to write a letter of advice a la an agony aunt.
Well, those are my two cents worth of relationship advice anyway, culled from personal experience and various advice columns I've read over the years. Hey, maybe I have a new career path in front of me: advice columnist to fictional characters. Sounds almost as strange and sycophantic as "psychic to the stars." *snickers* Think there's any future in it for me?
Helen Bianchin, Susan Napier and Robyn Donald are my guilty pleasure reads. Pub'd by Harlequin Presents, they tend to be mind candy. Bianchin has a pretty set formula: h/h are already lovers, but there is a social class issue and an ex-lover who wants the hero back, making the heroine insecure. *sigh* Why must I read these? I don't know, but I must. I cannot resist their siren song when I see Bianchin's name on a book in the end cap.
As I read HB's most current HP, The Marriage Possession (who comes up with these titles, that doesn't make sense and doesn't really go with the plot), I have came to the conclusion that most relationship problems in RomanceLandia could be solved if only the h/h spoke to each other about their goals and expectations and feelings. Aren't there advice columnists in RomanceLandia? Don't the h/h read the newpaper or magazines? There must not be, because if there were a Dan Savage or a Carolyn Hax or a Dear Abby or an Agony Aunt of some kind in them, the h/h wouldn't be having these problems. 'Cause DS and CH would be telling them to sit down and communicate.
So I am taking it upon myself (*sigh, hand to forehead*) to write a letter of advice a la an agony aunt.
Dear heroines and heroes,
I'm sorry to interrupt your passionate sex and/or equally passionate argument. I won't keep you long, I just need to share a few semi-healthy relationship tips with you.
1. Your mouths can do more than suck on each others' body parts. Please use them to talk to each other occasionally.
2. Your vocal chords are capable of producing sounds other than "Yes...oh god...more...like that, baby." Please practice saying things such as, "I don't need a heavy Relationship Talk or Promise of Forever, but are we heading anyplace with this thing, other than the bedroom?" Or even "I love you" if the phrase is relevant. Practice exercising your vocal chords (outside the bedroom, please).
3. If you feel as if you are being short-changed or ignored or shuffled off into the corner of your lover's life on a regular basis, say something! Protest! Hiding your hurt feelings perpetually leads your lover to think it's okay for you to be alone on holiday while s/he's cuddled up with family and friends. Letting your lover's family walk all over you is a similar exercise in frustration and wasted time.
4. Pony up. Or man up. Or suck it up. Whichever phrase floats your boat. Unless your lover a) was a virgin when you met or b) sprung full-grown from Zeus's skull, s/he has a romantic history. Hell, even if s/he is a virgin, there is bound to be someone who wanted him/her and who would jump his/her bones at the least come-on. But trust that s/he is with you for a reason and give the jealousy and/or insecurity a rest. If you can't, then maybe you need to take a step back and re-evaluate things.
H/H, you may have noticed, these tips are all about communication. Yes, body language is important, but so is the stuff that comes out of your lover's mouth. Pay attention!
Best wishes for an HEA,
jmc
Well, those are my two cents worth of relationship advice anyway, culled from personal experience and various advice columns I've read over the years. Hey, maybe I have a new career path in front of me: advice columnist to fictional characters. Sounds almost as strange and sycophantic as "psychic to the stars." *snickers* Think there's any future in it for me?
From Carrie http://lovelysalome.blogspot.com
Date: 2007-03-27 02:11 pm (UTC)I long ago noticed that some of the craftiest storytellers are those where the hero and heroine have a family support network. The authors of books where Miss Thang has a wise-talking sister and mother generally do not make the same dumb-ass mistakes. They can't. Sister and mother intervene and toss around snarky advice. The creativity involved in generating 400 pages of tension and unresolved Luuuurve is massive.
However, like many authors, I decided on the Heroine is an Orphan route. Sigh. I'm young. I'm inexperienced. I'm still learning. I cannot wrangle that much angst and misunderstanding from well-adjusted folks with hearty families and a loving background. It's just HARD. So I caved to convention and stole my heroine's support network -- except for the snarky best friend. At least she had some good sense.
One day, I would actually like to be good enough to write the books that impress me! And I see you've added me to the sidebar -- I traded you.
Orphans and cast offs
Date: 2007-03-28 11:45 am (UTC)I don't mind orphans as heroines...but I get frustrated when that lack of family network for support and advice also extends to a weak or absent network of friends or created family. The lack of one does not (to me) presuppose the lack of the other.